Eight years. Meet Carmelita.

Today is a bitter sweet day. I've been missing my Mama everyday for seven years now. But I refuse to be selfish and sad because I know that she is so much happier now watching us from heaven with my Papa. My siblings say I am so much like our mom. Everything that I know, I learned from her. I am my mothers daughter. So to help fight the sadness, I came up with a list of my childhood memories and some facts about my mom. That way, you can understand why I love her...


~ Her name is/was Carmelita. People called her Carmen, I called her Mama. My dad used to sing "Carmelita" by Victor Wood and it always made her smile. I thought it was super funny when I was a kid. Now I just think it's super sweet.


~ She was 13 years younger than my dad.


~ She was beautiful. My sister looks a lot like her. 


~ My dad courted my Grandmother so he can marry my mom. So old school.


~ She was petite. And always looked nice. 


~ She loved peanut butter on toast. She can and did, eat that everyday. 


~ She was into organic, natural stuff. 


~ Never smoke and never saw her drink. And with four kids, how can you not? (I mean drink. especially if we were your kids)


~ She was a housewife, had her own business for a few years but Dad didn't like that. Another old school.


~ She was STRICT. I was more afraid of her than my dad. Being "grounded" is nothing compared to her punishments. Let's just say there were some belts, yantok (big fat sticks) and Encyclopedias involved. But it was all out of love. And we always knew that.


~ She's always the first one to wake up in the morning. ALWAYS. And I'm talking about 4-5 am every single day. Prepared our breakfast and uniforms and baons (lunch).


~ Her famous recipe was Chili Con Carne. It was the bomb! I am still trying to perfect it.


~ She had nine siblings. She was a middle child. She was close to them, especially the girls. 


~ She loved morning walks. She was also into Tai Chi. If yoga was the thing then, she'd be into that. 


~ She loved it when I make her coffee in the afternoon.


~ She was very organized. We organized/cleaned my closet monthly. 


~ I LOVED it when she cleans my ears. It made me fall asleep.


~ I remember she would have her friends come over at the house and I would make coffee for them. That made her happy. And it made me feel proud. Hey, I was only 10 and I can make good coffee! :)


~ She never went anywhere by herself. She would always bring one of us with her. Sometimes all of us. 


~ She made the best noodle soup when we get sick. 


~ We used to go to my Dad's province every summer and we all enjoyed that. We were afraid of the house there because it was super old and creepy. But my aunts, uncles and cousins where always so hospitable. My mom was always on top of everything. Remember, there are 4 of us plus my mom and dad. She packed for everybody. 


~ My dad would always surprise her with stuff... and I mean STUFF... like a car or laser disk (at that time that was the "3D")... or just anything fancy. And it always came in the middle of the night because my dad worked 12 hours a day. But she remained humble and down to earth.


~ She loved it when I sing the karaoke.


~ She loved chocolate mints and peanut butter cookies.


~ Once I had a high fever... probably 104ish... She cuddled with me till I fell asleep because she said that would make me feel better. She was right. 


~ Her grandkids called her "Mama" not grandma. She was a little too young to be one. *wink to my sister*


~ When I was a kid she would make us sleep after lunch (nap time) and I used to fake it. She would lay blankets and pillows in the living room and turn the radio to 104.5 (it was old school radio station, definitely helps you fall asleep). No nap means no mirienda (snacks) and no playing outside with the cousins.


~ She loved to cook and clean. It seemed like it was all she did when we were at school.  In the Philippines, almost every body have helpers. But she was a neat freak and so was my dad. So besides the helpers doing there daily duties, she had her own cleaning routine.


~ My dad was a Custom Inspector. He had a bright white uniform. And the only person allowed to wash and iron it was my mom. Because he thinks only my mom can make it look perfect. He was right.


~ She had an unbelievable faith. I always think of her when I do my devotions. She used to read a lot of "The daily devotions" books and the Bible. I used to watch her because she always looked so peaceful when she does her devotions.


~ We used to go to the mall every weekend. She would pick out clothes for me until I was ...i think around 13. And I would cry. Because I always wanted something else.. (OMG! I just realized I used to be like Sammy. EEEeek!)


~ She was always so kind and patient. And always forgiving.


~ She was a hands on mom. She took care of all of us. No nannies. 


~ She was nice to my friends. She would cook and invite them over because I was not allowed to "go out". 


~ She was simple.  


~She was supportive. My brother Rokko went to 3 different colleges with different majors because he could not make up his mind. She supported it. 


~ She was honest. She didn't like gossiping. She taught me how to be the better person and as much as I can, understand other people and their feelings. She taught us be to respectful to others. 


~ She taught me how to choose my battles. Some things are just not worth the fight. 


~ She didn't ever want to leave for a few days vacation with her friends. She said she needs to be home to take care of us. She did leave for the US for a few months because she needed to use her Visa, she was very sad and missed us everyday. When she came back, she had BOXES full of pasalubong (goodies). I was super super excited! My favorite pasalubong was my black Esprit shoes, that I wore to school everyday. That made her happy.


~ We were always, ALWAYS her priority.


~ She was a strong person. Never showed us any fear or worry. Even when my dad got sick. She made us feel safe. When he passed away, she comforted us. 


~ She was very sad when my dad passed away, she never showed us. I watched her every morning talk to my dad's picture and always ended it with a kiss. 


~ She fought cancer like a champion. Even after four surgeries, she never complained. To me, she is a Champion. 


~ She took care of everybody even after being diagnosed with Brain Cancer. 


~ She was close to her cousins too.


~ When she was at the hospital, we were not allowed to spend the night with her. So she borrowed my disc man and listened to Christian music when we're not there. Her favorite was Don Moen.


~ She missed my brother Remus the most because he lives in the Philippines. 


~ She loved the stuffed animals family and friends gave her when they visited. 


~ We had a Collie named "Cali". She took very good care her. When my mom was on hospice at home. Cali never left her side. 


~ When she passed away, we had to get a couple more rooms at her wake to accommodate everybody. People loved her. 


~ She was buried on Valentine's Day.


~ I get teary eyed when I hear the song "Wind beneath my wings" because it reminds me of her. 


~ I still wear some of her clothes and shoes.


~ She was a good person, a loving mother, faithful wife, loyal sister and a forgiving friend. 


~ I looked up to her and I still do. 


This blog made me cry today. But it was tears of joy. It was nice to reminisce the good ol' days... I am so proud to be her daughter. These are just a few of my memories with my mom.  I'm sure I'll be adding some more as I remember them. To our family and friends, I would love to hear a story or two about how my mom, touched your life. Or any memory you have with her. That would just mean the world to me. Leave a comment here.... Can't wait to hear from you. Thank you!


ps.. I'll post another blog with her pictures... soon.